Why him?  

Posted by bernardo

Well now that it's the end of my middle school life, I don't really care too much about what some of the middle school friends reading this think. Some I do, some I don't. Right now I'm just like, why Jamil? I don't get it. It's really strange how the human mind works. People tend to say the things that make the other person happiest, however it's not always what they need, or want to hear. They person knows that they're doing what they're doing because they don't want feelings hurt. They don't want relationships broke. But sometimes people need to hear it.

Okay, so this girl Anamika right, she's this girl who I've had a history with. Like we're mad tight, almost best friends, maybe even best friends, I don't know, it's her call. But like she knows I have beef with this kid named Jamil. He was my best friend in 6th grade. He ended up being a loser, and I dislike him very much. When I found out they were going out, I was like "wat" and I called her. She told me this excuse, which I reall ydon't buy, she said, paraphrasing "it wasn't really my doing" and what really like was fucked up is that she
said "I don't really have anything else to do." Like how fucked up can you be? Going out with someone, just because you have nothing else to do. A person isn't a toyed, maybe she toys with peoples feelings, I don't know, I don't want to know.

Maybe that's what she's been doing with me this whole time. Maybe I was just a toy to her. It would seem so. I still have feelings for her. She's extremely important to me. I don't know what I've been doing wrong. That's the thing with gorgeous girls. Too many of them are extremely shallow. And when they aren't shallow they don't give people like me a chance at first sight. When they do, it's too late. You're too good of friends, and you're screwed. You're fucked in the butt. You're duked in the ass. You get my point.

I don't know what I'm gonna do. I don't want some ass-ugly girl, but I want someone who'll give me a chance. Give me that one chance. Don't wait too long, because that's what screws you in the end. You think of her one way, she thinks of you the other way. I guess I'll just be her toy for the time being. Until we lost connection. Until we lose touch. I don't know what I'll do, I'll probably do nothing. Let things go as they wish. I always get screwed in the end. no homo



"It is by acts, and not by ideas that people live"

4 comments

Haha. Well, you know, High school is only the beginning. I think. If you decide to do something stupid, it's pretty much the end for you.

How lucky you are to be able to be so serious in the internet. Maybe that's why I'll never get a job. Awesome.

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dude, its time to move on, she has revealed her inner-self, you know exactly what it is. she's not different, she's the same with most girls. she just knows how to hide it well. she had a good guise, don't you think? whatever yo, this is the reason why i don't like her. it's up to you if you want to still think about her. Shit happens, you have to let go, every single time you lose a girl. i let go with steph, shit happened, i fucked up, i can't get back with her. she doesn't want to get back together. it's a sad fact, but, you have to be less sensitive about it. I miss her so much, but, i gotta deal with it. there are more fish in the sea. steph was a very fortunate fish, thank god i was able to catch her before she lost herself in drugs, sex, and misery.

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